Dear Elon Musk, Can You Fix Global Warming?

14 Aug 2023

I hope this letter finds you in good spirits as you work to solve the world's problems.

I just wanted to check in about another small issue that's really heating things up around here, you know, global warming and whatnot.

Now I understand you've got your hands full between rocket launches, rolling out new Tesla models, and making sure there are no remnants left of Twitter online.

But if there's anyone who can help cool things around… I have a feeling it's you.

See, between record-breaking temperatures this summer, raging wildfires, and melted ice caps, Ol' Mother Nature is not looking too pleased these days. The thermometer just keeps climbing and the scientists all agree, things are getting pretty toasty out there.

But I do have faith that if you put your big, beautiful brain to the problem, you could crack the code on reversing global warming faster than you sent Starlink satellites into orbit. And that's saying something since you obliterated the record for most launches in a single year!

Since you were capable of achieving such a feat, I imagine another brilliant solution bursting from your genius mind. Maybe you could help reinforce Earth's ozone layer, or send some sort of "cape" to better protect us from the sun's intense rays.

I mean, you’re pretty much a “Hero” for most of us, but instead of you wearing a cape, you could make the planet have it and not let things keep getting too fiery. Or let’s say you can engineer some kind of protective solar shield to cast a refreshing shade over the whole planet.

There are several ways you could go about it and you’ll know this much better than I do with your great cerebral prowess. Not only do I know you can do this, I also believe it would be a great project to improve your public image.

I mean, the marketing possibilities are endless! You could call it Solarsats - satellite sun shades starting at just $19.99 per square foot. Or maybe PlanetX (I know you have a fixation with that particular letter). They would be robust radiation-resistant panels that’ll form a second protective skin for our world.

Of course, deploying a planetary sunshade would be no small feat, even for a man who's transforming transportation and space flight. But where there's a Musk, there's a way. You've proven time and time again that impossible is just another word for "not done yet" in your dictionary.

Regardless of whether it takes launching fleets of specialized climate satellites or some sort of radiation-resistant panels, I believe you can make it happen. You already transform stuff everywhere you go. Why not disrupt global warming like you disrupted government regulation with Tesla? Give Old Man Climate Crisis a run for his money!

Now I know you're busy with exponentially expanding visions, ventures (and removing any Twitter brand currency remaining). But between board meetings and factory tours, I hope you'll give some thought to how your numerous talents could help the whole world chillax. We're all counting on you to keep our only planet from cooking itself!

It would be so reassuring to see looming environmental threats diffused with your signature brand of optimistic audacity and carefree confidence. To live in a world where our children's children can focus on dreams of exploring Mars instead of combating rising sea levels.

So, I hope that in your downtime, when you're not designing new forms of sustainable transport or trying to implant chips in people’s brains, see if any ideas emerge for bringing our planetary climate back to a cooler mood.

Give old Mother Nature the air conditioning upgrade she desperately needs! I mean you already gave Tesla roadsters a nice and cool environment. It shouldn’t be too difficult to do that at scale, right?

I have a feeling that with your leadership and perseverance, you could turn global warming from an impending crisis into yet another problem solved; Thanks in no small part to the one visionary man most of us admire.

I look forward to hearing your groundbreaking proposals to heal our ailing atmosphere.

Until next time, keep doing the impossible as only you know how. Your admirer in a soon-to-be-cooled climate,